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27 December 2006 @ 08:24 pm
Seattle Grace Hospital  
Addison had left the trailer, a heavy feeling hovering over her. She knew the moment she and Derek shared in the trailer wouldn't be their last happy moment together. There were going to be lots of moments in which they would go out and find their love for one another again. The only problem was they would have to make time to work things out, to talk about the past, about Mark and Meredith, about why they fell apart.

It wasn't fair. Why couldn't they just know and move on? Why did they have to bring out the pain and everything that's happened? Addison knew it was something they needed to do. She knew very well without talking about those things, their marriage would fall apart again. She just wished they could fast forward through all of that and just be happy, just be Addison and Derek.

Of course, life never worked that way and they would have to battle it out, hoping and keeping faith that they would come out of it alive and stronger than ever.

She'd gotten Finn's first text message on her way to the hospital but decided against texting him back until she got to the hospital; however, by then he'd already withdrawn his first request and told her to take a rain check. Noting that she really needed to talk to him, Addison made a mental note to contact him later. The night before had been complicated and she was sure she'd led him on. Now things were different and she was going to work things out with Derek so she needed to tell him. He was a good friend and she was sure that she would need his shoulder to lean on when things got tough with Derek so she needed to be absolutely honest with him.

Her day had gone on with very little difficulty. Everything was the same as always. Patients, babies, mothers; just the same thing she dealt with on a day to day basis. Her mind however drifted to Derek quite often. They always had, but this had gotten to a point where she almost couldn't keep her mind off of it. Her mind was on Derek when she walked down the halls. It was on Derek when she wrote notes in a chart. The only time she could tear her mind away from Derek was when she was actually in surgery. She was a surgeon and her patients deserved the best. She would not let her personal life jeopardize a patient's life.

Now Addison was staring blankly down at a chart at the nurses' station, pen in hand but unmoving. All she could think about was Derek, wondering when she'd be able to see him again, when they could have a moment like they'd had that morning. She missed the sheer bliss and playfulness they'd always shared in the beginning of their relationship. The morning let her get a glimpse of that again and all she wanted was for every moment to be just like that; Addison and Derek, the way they were supposed to be. It was just a dream, but it was dream she was going to hold on to.
 
 
 
xaddis0nx on December 28th, 2006 11:33 pm (UTC)
"Oh," was all she said in reply. Addison was sure Derek had had a lot of spare time during the day and he would have had a great opportunity to catch up on his reading. However, she didn't want to bring it up, knowing that he would have explained himself if he wanted to talk about it.

She smiled when she felt his hand fall on her knee. It was a comforting gesture and she thanked him silently by placing her hand on top of his, letting her thumb gently stroke the back of his hand.

The contact was what they needed, the sign that they still cared for one another. It was their light at the end of the dark tunnel. She was going to hold onto as tightly as she could because she refused to give up. They'd been through so much and it would be a waste to stop now.

Addison gave his hand a gentle squeeze as she swallowed the piece of food in her mouth and looked over at him with a smile. With the feeling of his touch, she didn't feel the need to have to be talking. It just felt right, sitting here with him and enjoying their meal together. Sure, talking was something they'd always done, but being together was what mattered.
dr_shep on December 29th, 2006 06:42 am (UTC)
Derek's eyes met Addison's smiling ones as she looked over at him. This was just like their earlier blissfulness. It would have been better if they were talking, but it really wasn't necessary. They had physical contact, and they were at least assured of each other's love.

After a moment's consideration, he leaned over slightly to give her a kiss, purposely missing most of her mouth and planting his lips near the corner of her mouth. He didn't want to be too forward as he was still unsure of the 'rules.'
xaddis0nx on December 29th, 2006 07:21 am (UTC)
Addison squeezed his hand tighter as she felt his lips pressing gently against the corner of her mouth. She lifted it from it's place on her knee slightly so she could lace their fingers together. Smiling, her gaze shifted down to the food.

If they weren't going to be talking, she figured they could at least be happy for the time being. She smiled and picked up a piece of beef, bringing it to his mouth. It was something a newlywed couple would do, it was something they once did, and she knew she was probably being ridiculous, but she couldn't help wanting to keep them in sweet bliss for as long as she could.
dr_shep on December 29th, 2006 07:58 am (UTC)
Derek instinctively opened his mouth to allow her to place the beef in his mouth. It was an intimate gesture, and he smiled as he chewed it. He loved this intimacy. It reminded him of their perfect morning.

They would come back here again where this wasn't a rarity. Loving gestures wouldn't be anything special because they would be constant. He would never let them stop.

"Thank you," He smiled after he swallowed and brought his free hand up to brush her hair behind her ear.
xaddis0nx on December 29th, 2006 08:11 am (UTC)
Addison smiled at Derek as she leaned into his touch. Those gestures were always endearing to her; tucking her hair behind her ear, fixing the collar of her blouse. She'd always loved little things like that that used to fill every spare moment of their relationship.

It'd come to the point where it didn't happen quite as often, but that was all going to change. She hoped that they would happen more ofthen rather than go down to zero, but she refused to focus on the bad possibilities right now.

"So how's the Kung Pao chicken?" she asked since she'd yet to eat some of it, taking a piece with her chopsticks and pretending to examine it closely as she awaited his reply.