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29 May 2007 @ 09:48 pm
We all get by with a little help from our friends  
Their day at the Brownstone had gone fairly well. There was a lot of pain and plenty of tears were shed, but at the end of it all, Addison and Derek had managed to find each other again. They were starting over, beginning a new life. It wasn't so much a clean slate because their past was always going to be there, but they were finally getting past it and letting go, moving on with their lives so they could be happy the way they should be.

After they'd spent the rest of their afternoon together shopping and doing other "things," they decided to give their friends and family a call, knowing that they'd never be able to live it down if someone found out that they were back in New York and didn't bother to tell anyone. Addison had called Savvy and Weiss first before calling Derek's mom. The plan soon became having dinner with Savvy and Weiss that evening and lunch with Mama Shepherd the next day.

Now they were at their friends' house. Derek was out in the living room with Weiss while Addison stayed in the kitchen to help Savvy.
 
 
 
xaddis0nx on July 3rd, 2007 07:14 am (UTC)
Addison snuggled against him and smiled, "I know. I've really missed spending time with them like that." She paused for a several moments, remembering the events of this evening before adding, "I think they have a happy future ahead of them...right after they get back on the same page that is."

Suddenly everything about having children came rushing back to her as she chanced a glance at Derek. She knew he would make a great father one day, and she'd really love it that could be proven soon, but she knew they weren't exactly ready for it. They were only starting to get over their past mistakes. There wasn't much room to make many new ones, and right now, Addison really didn't know where Derek stood on the subject of children. From what she saw at Savvy and Weiss's, though, didn't look like it'd do her any good to bring it up.
dr_shep on July 3rd, 2007 03:59 pm (UTC)
Derek nodded slightly. He'd noticed the coollness between the couple earlier, but he'd been willing to play it off. Obviously, it was still on Addison's mind. He didn't want to bring it up however because it didn't look as if it would end positively, at least not yet.

"They've been through a lot. I don't think we can expect them to regain everything so quickly," Derek shrugged, placing one hand across his body and resting it on her knee.
xaddis0nx on July 3rd, 2007 05:36 pm (UTC)
"Yeah," Addison said softly, "They're not like us." She smiled at him, letting out a small laugh as she rested her forehead against his temple.

They seemed so happy here, and that only made her want to have children more. It'd be a good environment for them to be in. There wouldn't be any fighting or any major arguments. Everything would play out nicely and they'd finally have the family they'd always dreamed of.

Getting lost in the perfection of the moment, Addison decided to take a leap of faith and asked, "Do you--Do you ever think about having kids anymore, Derek?"
dr_shep on July 4th, 2007 04:37 am (UTC)
Derek allowed a small sigh to escape his lips when Addison wondered about children. They'd vaguely discussed children, and he'd gotten quite a view of how Addison was feeling back at Savvy and Weiss's. This topic concerned him more than he was willing to admit.

He'd always wanted a child. He had a family of super fertile sisters, and it was almost expected that he have mulitple children. It had always been Addison who just wasn't ready for the whole thing. They'd pushed things aside for their careers, and their marriage had certainly suffered for it.

But Derek just couldn't see having a child as a cure all. It wasn't going to magically solve their problems to bring a life into the world. They were so perfect right now. It was a lot more than he was willing to jeopardize, but he didn't want to alienate Addison. That would have been the worst thing of all.

"I... thought about it a lot when we were first together. How could I not with the sheer volume of children my sisters manage?" He mused after a few moments, bringing one hand to run through his hair as he leaned back on the other. "We would have beautiful children, Addie, and you're the only one I could ever raise a child with. But--"

"Are we ready for that? We're barely on two feet as it is.'
xaddis0nx on July 4th, 2007 05:49 pm (UTC)
Addison looked over at Derek and gave him a small nod understandingly before turning away and bringing her legs up to hug them. She knew that Derek was right. That was one of the reasons why she'd been reluctant to bring the subject up in the first place.

But she couldn't help but feel they were ready to face this challenge. They'd never been stronger, and she knew that if they pulled together, they could do this. Most importantly, though, she was scared.

Specializing in neonatology, Addison knew everything about conceiving to the rates of miscarriages. It would already be a major risk at her age to have a baby. She knew that that risk would only run higher if they waited longer. She didn't want to miss her chance, nor did she want to ruin anything with herself and Derek.

"I know," she said softly, keeping her eyes away from him, "It's hard to say that we are. But just look at us, Derek."

Addison turned and looked at him, her eyes filled with fear and anxiety, "We've never been this strong, and we've already proven that our love goes beyond the vows or the rings. I think we can do this, but you've waited all these years for me to be ready. I'll do the same for you."
dr_shep on July 4th, 2007 10:37 pm (UTC)
Derek sighed when he saw how fearfully she was looking at him. For the last dozen years, he'd wanted nothing more than to make Addison happy, and now he couldn't come up with a way to do that. She was understanding, and he knew she would never blame him for wanting to wait. It was just second nature to want to give her what she wanted.

"Addie," He reached out and brushed a lock of hair behind her ear before scooting closer to her and enveloping her in his arms. With a soft kiss to her temple, Derek sent his eyes upward and tried to figure out what he should say.

"I don't know what to do. I want to have a baby with you. I want nothing more than that. Let's just... let things happen. I know I love you, and I know nothing is going to change that."